MoxieintheCity.net - Social/Professional Networking Events & Workshops

May 11
Do Guys Stop Flirting When They Get a Girlfriend?

May 11
He's a Serial Flirter

May 10
Dude, Maybe She's Just Not That Into You

May 10
What Ever Happened to Trust?

May 10
Her Boyfriend Is a Serial Flirter

May 08
He Only Wants To See Her On Weekends...Does That Mean It's Over?

May 06
Friends With Benefits - Confusing Sex With Love

Apr 18
ASK MOXIE - Are You Sending Off The Wrong Signals?

Apr 13
Should She Tell Him She's a Virgin?

What Ever Happened to Trust?

Name: Anita
Location: New York , New York

Question: My boyfriend and I meet by craigslist year ago and he
is just perfect. We have very nice relationship and I have nothing to
complain about. I posted an ad on
craigslist to see if he'd answer me and he did...

He answered the posting then I requested pics, which he sent to me. I'm very upset about that, cause our
relationship it is perfect and he is very nice to me. Now I really don't
know what to do. I am brazilian and he is american. I don't know how
this works - the second chance thing -is he really cheating me by e-mail?.... Send me your
opinion. Its very important to me. Thanks |Age: 26
=================================================
I have to be honest here....I don't feel bad for you. You set yourself, and your guy, up. You laid a trap for him and he took the bait.

It's very simple.....if you don't trust your boyfriend, you shouldn't be dating your boyfriend. Your relationship can not be "perfect" if he's cruising Craigslist and playing Nancy Drew.

Is he cheating on you by exchanging e-mails? Sort of. But it's inevitable that he'll actually start screwing someone else if he hasn't already. When a guy really loves you and is committed to you.....he might peruse the ads, but he doesn't answer them.

You don't have a relationship with this guy because neither for you have fully taken the leap and committed to each other.

Does trust exist anymore? Is it me or has it become ten times easier to cheat and/or to catch a cheater? Which is great....but what about the times when you "catch" someone who's innocent?

How many stories have we heard about people creating fake online dating profiles so they can contact the new guy or girl they've been dating and see if they flirt back?

How many times have we heard about people (myself included) checking phone logs on people's cell phones to get the number of a woman or man who called their mate?

Have we become so reliant on gadgets and technology to determine someones intentions and forgotten all about taking the risk and just being willing to believe in someone else?

I read through the comments posted for the "Letting Go of The Leash" post. That was a story about a wom,an who's boyfriend got a text message at 10:30 on a Saturday night froma 22-year old that worked at her boyfriends gym. She also mentioned that her guy had standing "boys nights" with his friends that sometimes turned co-ed, but that she was never included.

One commenter suggested she go down tot he gym and check out this 22-year old. Befriend her, someone said. Find out how she looks in a skirt, another said. Then someone suggested that she check her boyfriend's phone and get the number of the girl texting him and see if he's talked to her more than that one night.

How about....trust your boyfriend until he gives you an explicit reason not to. See, this sort of secret op type of behavior is why women get labeled psycho. Just because a guy talks to another woman doesn't mean he's cheating. Just because the boyfriend of the woman who wrote the letter above responded to her post doesn't necessarily mean he would have cheated on her (although, yeah, it's likely.)

It just makes me wonder...have we stopped trusting people too much and started testing them instead?

READ FEEDBACK FROM OTHER SINGLES HERE:
http://moxieblog.typepad.com/moxieblog/2006/05/entrapment_reas.html#comments2006-05-10

Our Events:

Click city for details!

What Ever Happened to Trust?